"I feel like Anthony Bourdain"

Hello!  I've been a bit behind in my blogging, but since the hectic first weeks are now behind us, I think (hope?) that it will be a bit easier now.  This past week was rather average, except for 2 wonderful eating experiences.

Friday we went to Chinatown - a crowded, bustling neighborhood that was more gritty than downtown Bangkok.  Ashley, Maria and I explored for a few hours, roaming the crowded streets and tight alleyways. The neighborhood was really neat, but the highlight was definitely the lunch.  This is where the blog title comes in: because we seriously felt like Anthony Bourdain.
It was the most "authentic" place I've ever seen in my life, and pictures don't quite do it justice (mostly because we were touristy enough, and after a few quick photos elicited gaping stares, I figured I should probably stop).  We wandered down this tiny alley, where a few different women had set up individual restaurants with a couple tables each.  Restaurant isn't quite the correct adjective, though - food was cooked on an open, homemade fire pit, girls were chopping veggies at the table next to us, and we were sharing this small patch of pavement with dogs, lizards and cats.  Our table was tucked beneath corrugated metal roofing, next to people's ramshackle houses, with occasional drips of water from the balconies above us.
There was a three-way language barrier, from Chinese to Thai to English.  Furthermore, we were a rather motley crew: Maria looks Thai but doesn't speak Thai, Ashley is Chinese but doesn't speak Chinese, and I was the token unidentifiable white friend.  After a game of charades, we got out seafood medley over rice.  It was delicious, and probably tasted even better since we saw it being cooked right in front of us.  When Ash wanted some more fish, a woman thrust a steak of it in her face, and threw it on the wok after a nervous nod from Ashley.  It was definitely a great choice for lunch, and it was so unlike anything I've ever experienced, that it barely felt real.  Craziest meal I've ever had.
After lunch we roamed the food market, where we sampled and shared chestnuts, whipped chocolate-ice, lotus seed bun, cassava roll, dates, raisins, egg tart, mango...and all in small, cheap portions.  It's so nice to be able to buy a handful of something, or single items - I feel like this is entirely absent in the states.

Two nights ago we went with Ajan (professor) Alex to one of his favorite restaurants.  He has been giving us free, optional language classes twice a week, and we decided to grab some food after one of the lessons.  The restaurant was a fairly standard Thai place, but was still packed at 10pm - definitely a popular dig.  Alex ordered an assortment of dishes that he has grown to love.
Alright, so here's the deal: I had 10 types of animal that night, for about 2 dollars.  And we're not talking huge, binge-like portions - we all shared the dishes, which were fairly light and healthy.  1st: catfish, served fried with papaya salad.  Then shrimp, squid and clam in the tom yam soup, which is a traditional dish with lemongrass and coconut milk.  After, fried duck and pork strips with a spicy dipping sauce.  Next, frog legs, roasted and fried, with garlic and bay leaves.
And then!?!?! Alex goes out to a food cart passing by on the street, and orders a few bags of unidentifiable objects. As he approaches, we catch sight of the snacks: alas, they were bugs.  And creepy crawlies.  And so, I ate lizard (photo), cricket and bamboo worm for dessert - definitely didn't see that coming! They seemed to be roasted and salted, and didn't really taste much like anything.  Crunchy I guess? We went outside to explore the rest of the vendor's wares, which included coconut jellies and warm milk cake.  This guy was selling bugs and desserts!  What king of business model is that?!  Only in Thailand...

And in the spirit of good food, the rest of the photos are from the night market by campus.  It's open a few days a week and sells food, clothes, shoes and goldfish.  Great place to explore when you're feeling bored or wanting to spend some baht.

On another note, here are some some cultural differences that I've been noticing:

• no one uses knives: fork and spoon only.  I couldn't begin to tell you why...knives were invented for a reason!  
• short skirts are more acceptable than spaghetti straps - I was recently "cockadoodle-dooed" at, which was a bit uncomfortable.
• bathrooms usually don't have toilet paper or paper towels, which is sometimes inconvenient, but must surely save a lot of trees.
• people don't really talk on the bus, metro, or transportation in general - so we're usually the obnoxious white kids who are REALLY LOUD.
• the king is tremendously honored, and insulting him could land you a spot in jail.
• pale skin is considered beautiful, and stores sell "whitening cream" instead of self-tanner.
• most stairs are at completely random intervals!  You really need to watch where you're going, because that baby step always gets ya.  Sidewalks are very irregular too.
• many Thais don't have kitchens, and eat all their meals at small, quick restaurants or street vendors.  Therefore, there are hundreds of cheap, delicious, exciting food options everywhere you go.
• shout-out to the Anderson twins: sometimes people serve drinks in plastic bags with a straw, to save on all the individual packing.  Genius, I suppose, but a bit precarious!

It's off to bed for me.  Tomorrow morning we're all going to Ko Samet, and island about three hours away, for a long weekend.  It's our first non-Kelly trip - and is sure to be absolutely insane.  More to come on that!

Good night, good morning, peace and love from Thailand~